I'm worried. I dont wanna get stuck in transition. I'm in between past and present. I dont wanna go back to the past yet the present doesnt seem to be working out for me. I dont want to just spend the rest of my sec3 life looking stupid and being a clown again. I wanna be a social, i wanna be close to ppl. I want more basketball.LOL. the basketball part a bit out of the topic. Life is so boring, I go hm and play on my stupid psp for hrs hoping to go out with my frens but in the end. no one want go out. sian. tmr night i would probably go for a long jog to do more self reflection. I have to grow up abit more but yet i dont wanna be so mature for its going to be so emo and all. I past the stage of a clown but yet I dont wanna act matured yet. its just not very fun to be mature. and my studies....its not doing tt well. I wanna buck up but i hate studying. I want to enjoy slacking off during my wkends.

clearing up the mess....
I have no fallen for anyone. You can choose to feel so but tts only how you feel. I just wanna be a social. I wanna have my freedom unlike being cooped up at hm like a pet. I wanna enjoy the rest of sec3 b4 moving on the sec 4 and chionging than. I want to have a close buddy to rely on all the time. which cannot be found anywhere.

I wanna understan whats its like to love and to be love. not exactly being feeling it or experiencing it but to understand it. I dont wanna take it for granted and i dont wanna make the same mistakes again. probably none of you readers know what I'm meanign now. its just a complicated section of my brain, lost in time.